This might end up a little nonsensical, I'm not entirely sure where it's going yet. But basically, I hate how money has to rule our lives. I was discussing this with my friend yesterday, he cannot go to a Germany for a medieval festival thing that he has been offered an invite to, and I cannot go to Vienna with my lovely friend Phoebe, all because we have no money of our own. 

At the moment, I have no job, £200 and I was even going to sell my clothes, but still, I doubt it would work, and maybe I get too involved with Vienna because I love the Sound of Music so much or maybe I got emotionally shifted by a Holocaust survivor last week who, even to this day, talks about Vienna with such pride, he told us of all the little families living in their huge flats, the unused palaces that became schools and museums, the beautiful palace gardens that became parks where parents could take their children to learn to walk or rise bicycles amongst the flower beds, take picnics and feed the birds. The architecture, the pride, the beauty, I want to see it for myself.

There's always next year, or the year after, I'll be busy or working but I'll keep it in mind. I've never been more upset about a place before. I feel quite ridiculous. My friend doesn't know if he'll be asked to go another year to Germany, that's the problem with being stuck in Britain. If we were in... France or somewhere on mainland Europe, we could just hop on a train, it wouldn't cost as much and trains can go everywhere. 

This is enough, I'm going to get some toast and tea, now I can finally eat again.

So far, I have been lucky enough to avoid any stress in the exam period, I just feel so relaxed about it all, English is on Wednesday, so I'm sure all my stress will cause me to cry at some point... No worries :)

On Saturday night my friends and I went to the Scottish Ballet's version of A Streetcar Named Desire by Tennessee Williams.

It was wonderful, we had a box which looked straight onto the stage and it was all ours. Phoebe brought strawberries and Lucy brought lemonade which was just lovely, apart from Phoebe must have the most difficult Tupperware box to open... It squeaked and squeaked when the music was quiet but eventually she opened it with out superhuman strength.

Phoebe, Charli, me, Lucy all before the Ballet

(I'm slightly jealous of Phoebe's jacket but I won't tell her that)

Anyway, I hope everyone has a fantastic... time because I don't know when I'll blog again.

xxxx

Hello peoples, I haven't posted in a while but at least I have lots to talk about today.

First of all, I would like to say that I am finally feeling more at peace with the world, I wasn't feeling best ever last week for multiple reasons that I do not wish to explain but they were bad (yay). So after a fit of complete rage and storms and evil has come out of me for the past week, I am finally feeling so peaceful, I have found myself in a little bubble of my own, with the people I love back in it.

I have these issues with pushing the people I love most away from me when I can't exactly push the evil out from myself. So I apologise to every person I hurt, I've tried to make things better and hopefully succeeded. 

I have also decided on my new haircut... Sort of Alexa Chung's style when it is longer and I shall get copper highlights, I'll miss my long hair, I miss my REALLY long hair I had two years ago, I went through a fashion phase that I will live to regret for the rest of my life... Eurgh.

Isn't she FAB?

I think Alexa Chung is wonderful, just because she is who she is. No reason, I just want to hug her and go shopping, and maybe discuss her life with her over a coffee. I would say I want to be her but that isn't true, I want to be like her, in the way that she has a mind of her own where she is not influenced by anyone or anything else in the decisions she makes. 

I have now completed the school year. Well, exams are still to come but I'm close enough to say I'm done, only one year to go and I will be kicked out into the big bad world to fend for myself, it's a scary thought, the thirteen years we spend in school are like a safety net, we always have something to be doing or to improve on, but when that's gone, we just have to keep moving forward.

I'm also making some shorts, I found some nice material, it's a salmon pink and it shimmers gold when it moves, I think they will either be my festival or Spain shorts.

Anyway, sorry this has been a ramble, but sometimes they are interesting to read. 

Bye-bye

xxx

I feel the need to write, just anything. Well, minus my photograph evaluation which counts as our exam which is first thing tomorrow morning. Oops. 

First of all I want to start with the great things that I really appreciate in spite of the bad weekend I've had, as have many. I went to see Frightened Rabbit on Saturday night, they're my favourite. They play the most beautiful songs in the most fantastic way. Phoebe and I went and waited for a hug but obviously, the bad luck continued and the lead singer did not come out after the gig. I did get a hug from the lead singer of Brazil Exists. They're so cute, I think I scared him but I guess he wasn't used to being asked for hugs from strangers. I just like to share the love, is that a crime?

Here is some Frightened Rabbit, I suggest you listen and soak up their fantabulousness.

Scottish Wind- Frightened Rabbit

Also, I suggest you listen to some Brazil Exists, they're the most adorable bunch of guys. A mix between Twin atlantic and FRabbit.

Brazil Exists

Today I also got a bunch of flowers, some chocolates and a card from Aly dearest because I'm ill. It made me cry it was so cute, yes, I am over emotional, it's been a rough few days.

On Friday, we lost a friend, Moyra-Liz As-Chainey was found dead after she had been missing since Wednesday. It is at times like these we learn to appreciate who we have and the lives we live, I'm not lying when I direct anyone who reads this to live each day like it is their last, if you see an opportunity take it, never be left wondering "what if".

Moyra was a beautiful girl, she had a heart of gold and a smile which could warm a cold day. It is surreal to think that something so dreadful could happen to such a wonderful, loved girl.

On days like these, the school joins together, we can support each other through anything and that is what really touched me today. A minutes silence happened for her this morning, it was said how she would not want us to be sad because she is gone, but be happy because she has lived, and I am truly grateful to Moyra for being part of my life, she would laugh at us all if she saw the amount of tears we cried, she'd tell us that we were silly. Without her I wouldn't have made such close bonds with the people I have. But I regret not ever telling her how much that meant to me. Flowers were put down in her memory, letters, pictures, photographs were put down too.

Me, Abby, Lily, Moyra, Roisin.

This day was the highlight of my school years. The whole idea was Moyra's and Lily's.

RIP Moyra, we love you

xxxxx

Today I spent my time finishing off my art folios. I'm less than impressed by them, I have a feeling I will get a very poor grade, especially in my expressive work. My design I'm dealing with right now, my dress is made, my sheets are finished and all I need to do is write a brief. It's a lot of stress right now, exams usually are. But I am dealing with it in the hope that one day I can become a costume designer on Broadway, failing that, Disneyland. As long as I get to use glitter and sequins with people viewing my designs I am happy.

I am currently trying to fit my history extended essay into song form so I can remember it. I can get the introduction to fit in with the chorus of Pumped Up Kicks by Foster the People. The introduction doesn't give me a lot of marks.

Unfortunately, this has got me amused, if you have exams... Click the link below, I want to see if everyone gets distracted by this:

http://procatinator.com/

Love you long time!

xxxxx

I spent a glorious day with my boyfriend, Aly, in Glasgow yesterday. He bought me a beautiful white lacy dress with a heart shape cut out at the back for my birthday. I think I will wear it to my birthday party on Friday. My own purchases were sun glasses, a photo album and a book about moustaches from Urban Outfitters. I like moustaches, they amuse me and create a talking point. We also went to an Angels and Airwaves gig... Yes, I stood in the same room as Tom Delonge and was not impressed. He was fairly calm, the entire concert was calm, I like music where everyone can just let go and dance however they want and not be afraid to show it. I was, however impressed by the gigantic glitter ball in the hall. I have a magpie-mind, anything that sparkles and glitters pleases me and I must own it.

When I got home, mum had bought me masks for the girls attending my party, they're so cute for cheap, tacky plastic. But sometimes gold and silver glitter just makes everything look ten times better. She's planning on getting One Direction, Justin Bieber or cowboy masks for the boys... MMM, One Direction are cute.

Here is a dress similar to mine, I can't find the exact one but it's the same shape and colour.

Bye xxxxx

Hello, I'm Jac, a sixteen (but soon to be 17, YAY) year old girl who loves a wide variety of things. I live in a city placed in the middle of beautiful surroundings. You could say we get the both worlds here in the capital of the Highlands of Scotland but to be honest, most people choose to hate it here. I like it, we have easy access to shops but we can escape to a more natural surrounding if we want to. I like it, I wouldn't like to call anywhere else in the world "home". 

Here is my face... and part of my room. Another interesting fact about Jac, I love bright red lipsticks. They make my face seem almost not dull. This has been enough drivel about myself. 

Bye-bye xxxxxxx